Why do I exist?

Hi guys! 

Have you ever started writing a post, then realised that nobody would actually care?
Cause, yes. And I'm quite happy about it cause this is kinda the only place where I could 
actually pour my feelings out to. Talking to my own personal "wall".


I'm confused, lost, broken, paranoid, sensitive. Know this feeling? Yea, it sucks. Everything in
life is just so pointless. What's the point in life. We live to die. I know I should be more hopeful.
Yes, I wanna get married and experience REAL love not just some fucking puppy love. But.......
I'm afraid.


Do you ever feel you'll grow old ALONE. Like seriously alone.... I don't want that. I want to 
be loved. I want to be cared for. I want somebody I could depend and rely on. Somebody who
I feel safe and secure with... But on second thought, do I deserve this? Who would actually 
want me. I mean, my flaws are never ending. And I'm a selfish attitude heartless bitch. Karma
will get me, yea. Maybe karma won't let me be loved? I don't know.


I think too much. Yea. I think so too. 


I can't really rant on twitter. :( Everybody would see. They will be like "Oh, emo girl is here." 
Will they? I don't know but people are so fucking judgemental. At least posting in my blog is
like some how unknown? Who would randomly check my blog, haha. 

xx, Justsoheartache.